Nothing But Regrets
by Avoline Malfoy
Summary: Daryl has lost track of the car that took Beth. He wallows in self pity, until a young woman shows up begging for his help. Will she be his redemption, or will she be another name on his list of regrets? Rated M cause, hey, it's Daryl Dixon, and just in case.
1. Loosing Track

_Disclaimer: I own nothing. Not even Daryl._

* * *

_Rule one about being the child of an American redneck: Never watch a show where the redneck is basically the most important person there is._

_I have fallen head over heels in love with Daryl Dixon. I would love to be a walker on the show and have Daryl kill me lol!_

_Anyway, this is my version of what happens after Beth gets taken. I'm completely ignoring how the show went and creating my own reality for it. I'm eliminating that group of wackos Daryl was traveling with, and there will be mentions of Terminus._

_Anyway, this is my first TWD fic, so if you like it, leave a review. I don't beg for them, but I do get all excited about them lol._

_Sit back and enjoy!_

_Love always,_

_Avoline_

* * *

I just sat there, wondering how the hell I lost the car's tracks. I never lose tracks like that. Never! Yet I couldn't tell which way the car went, and I didn't have time to go each way looking for it. I had one job, one fucking mission! And I still fucked it up.

Beth was gone.

I fought back the tears, just like I always did. I wasn't even going to try and hope that she was okay. That car took her three days ago. There was no way that she was still alive. All I had to do was keep Herchel's daughter alive, and I couldn't even do that. I pushed her away. I did everything I could to make her hate me. I made it clear to her that I would never enjoy her being around.

But I couldn't stop myself from getting to know her. Before I could blink, the girl had gotten into my head.

I was starting to remember why I never let anyone get to close.

My chest ached, and I silently cursed myself. First it was losing Merle. Then I made the mistake of letting Carol get close, only to lose Sophia. Sure, she seemed more free afterwards, but I could see that haunted look in her eyes. Then we lost Andrea. Then I found my brother, only to loose him again. Hell, I had to fucking put him down. After the Governor destroyed our safe haven, it was only me and Beth.

Now it's just me.

A noise to my left reaches my ears, but I tuned it out. I couldn't deal with reality right then. I just wanted to be left alone.

"Hello?"

I shifted my gaze to the side. Large, black animal. A horse, I realized. A massive black horse. I never knew horses got that big.

"You're not one of them, are you?"

A woman. She must be sitting on the horse. Never knew you could ride a horse that big. She sounded scared, and was probably alone. Like me.

"No, I ain't," I growled.

"Thank God," she nearly sobbed. "I thought I was alone." I finally lifted my head to look at her.

Red hair. Brown eyes. There's an old fashioned long bow slung across her torso. The saddle was equipped with a quiver slam full of arrows. Her jeans were a bit worn, but not ripped. Her shirt had just about had it, the material so threadbare that I could see how filthy her bra was.

There was a dear behind the saddle. It was haphazardly secured, but I could tell it was fresh. There was still some blood dripping from the nose.

A trail for the walkers to follow.

"Ya realize dem walkers are gonna foller that blood trail 'till it stops bleedin', right," I muttered, hoping my backwoods accent would make her leave. She could clearly hold her own, but I did not want another life to have to keep alive.

"I was hoping maybe you could help me with that," she answered shyly. "My daddy taught me to hunt, but we never thought about the blood trail left behind. It never crossed our minds." I raised an eyebrow at her. "Please, this is the first kill I've had in weeks. I'll give you half, even lead you to a place with more arrows for your crossbow. Just show me how to stop the blood from dripping."

She sounded so damn pitiful. I could only think of how I felt when I first thought Merle dead. Alone. Scared, even though I wouldn't admit it. If I had been brave enough to ask, I probably would have begged anyone for help as well. That horse was probably all she had left of her family, like Merle's bike was for me.

I stood up and met her gaze. I would not let her loose that horse like I lost Merle's bike.

"Ye got a rag er somethin'," I asked. She handed me an old black bandana. "Ye wanna take yer rag or some clothe an' press it against t'nose, like this." I wadded it up and pressed it against the nose, covering the whole end. "Lemme see that rubber band in yer hair. Ah'll give it back as soon as we cut th' deer up a bit." She pulled it out, and I got a good look at how long her hair was. It damn near reached her ass. "Ye take the rubber band or a length a' string and secure it on th' end. Ye'll have ta change th' rag out ev'ry hour, hour an' a half. Keeps the blood from soakin' strait through." I stepped back and let her admire my handiwork. "An' that's how ye do it."

She looked so damn happy. Like I had showed her the fountain of youth or the holy grail. I could see the tears in her eyes, and I had to look away. Is was almost too much for me to handle, seeing a girl cry. I looked away so she wouldn't see.

"Thank you, mister," she whispered. "Thank you so much." I nearly laughed, thinking of an old Tim McGraw song.

"Ya ain't gotta call me mister, hon," I began, starting to relax a bit. "Name's Daryl, but most call me an 'asshole redneck.'" She laughed, bringing a small smile to my face.

"I'm Annie," she stated. Ironic. A red head named Annie. "Climb on. I know where there's a Bass Pro Shop that hasn't been touched."

I'm starting to like this girl.


	2. Loosing Faith

_Disclaimer: I own nothing. Not even Daryl._

* * *

_So, I'll take it that the first chapter was a hit. Great! I guess I'm not doing half bad!_

_So, here's the next chapter. Sit back and enjoy!_

_Love always,_

_Avoline_

* * *

It was dark when we finally stopped to make camp. I gutted the deer cause apparently, Daddy didn't teach her that either. Once the guts were gone, I sliced the meat up into thin steaks and wrapped them in a bag I had in my pack. Amazingly, she knew how to start a fire and keep it going. We cooked up a couple of the steaks to eat, which left us with about eight. Good sized deer for such a small girl to haul up on that massive horse.

"So, what did you do before all this went down," she asked. I took another bite, trying to figure out how to not answer her question. I just met her. I was not about to let her get close just to get hurt again.

"Nothing," I answered. Maybe that would keep her from asking any more questions.

"That doesn't tell me much," she laughed, and I knew she wasn't going to let it go. But I was telling the truth, at least.

"That's what I did," I growled. "Nothing. Just some redneck." I didn't mention Merle. It was still to painful to even think about.

I didn't want to tell her how I was just some junkie. I didn't want her idea of who I was to be ruined by the truth. Plus, she was doomed anyway. She's a tiny little thing, no bigger than a stick. Them walkers will get her one day. If I could just keep her at bay, maybe it wouldn't hurt as bad when she dies. Keep the people I meet at bay. That's always been my plan.

Didn't work worth a shit, if I was being honest with myself.

Loosing Lori hurt. Killing Dale hurt. Hell, I even missed T-Dog. Might as well make one good friend, even if she was basically doomed. Aren't we all?

"Daryl, at this point, I don't care if you were some Hell's Angels degenerate," she stated. "We're both still alive. And we aren't those things, so we might as well get to know each other." She pulled her knees up and rested her chin on them, staring at me. "I'll go first. I was raised on a farm just outside of LaGrange. My daddy taught me to hunt and fish and how to break and ride horses. We had at least a hundred top quality cutting horses. Apollo was our best stud, and the biggest and strongest of our stock. I had just graduated from Auburn University with a degree in anything to do with running a horse farm when all this shit started. I'm only about twenty six or so, and I guess I've kinda given up on my biggest dream." I snorted a bit. Who hasn't given up?

"An' what's that," I questioned.

"Being a mom."

I might as well have been shot in the chest. I wanted kids before all this as well. I wanted to prove that I was nothing like my dad or my brother. The closest I ever got was holding little Judith.

Guess we got more in common than I thought.

"I was a drifter with my brother," I began, knowing this probably wasn't the best idea. "I jus' did whatever he said. Money was never easy, but it was a livin'. It got us away from our dad, an' it supported his drug habit." I fought back the lump in my throat. "I never touched th' drugs but once. That was all it took. Jus' that once a' havin' someone high as fuck holdin' a gun t'my head." I snorted again. "Now I fell like th' only one that can stay alive anymore."

I don't know when she got up, but as soon as I was done talking, her hand was on my arm.

"So this isn't really anything new to you," she whispered. I shook my head.

"Ye had it easy before this," I pointed out. "Yer daddy loved ya and cared for ya. I'm sure yer mama was th' same. Ye had a nice house, and everything ya could ever want er need. Me, I had a drunk for a daddy, an' he never hesitated to hurt me. My ma was about th' same. My brother abandoned th' family as soon as he could." I couldn't stop the feelings from showing. The hurt, abandonment, the anger. I might as well had Beth there with me. I might as well been back at that shiners house. "Now they're all gone." She wrapped her arms around me as the tears started to fall.

God, I was such a pussy lately.


	3. Loosing Fear

_Disclaimer: I own nothing. Not even Daryl._

* * *

_Yes, Daryl is being a total pussy. He's opened up to a girl he just met. But keep in mind everything he's been through since we first see him._

_So, now that Daryl is showing his softer side, who's ready to see what happens next?_

_Sit back and enjoy!_

_Love always,_

_Avoline_

* * *

I sat behind her saddle, not even bothering to hold on since we weren't going any faster than a walk. Apollo was well aware of the situation he's been in for the past year or so, stepping so quietly and not making any noise. Never knew a horse was that smart. She kept saying that, once we get there, we'd have to find a safe place for Apollo.

"Ye mean we're goin' to Atlanta," I exclaimed.

"Unfortunately," she answered. "It's the only one that hasn't been picked clean cause no one can get to it. But since the walkers, as you call them, have moved out of the city, it's more accessible." I nodded, understanding what she was saying. "We'll bring our stuff with us so that, should he have to run, there's nothing weighing him down."

Hopefully, he won't have to run.

"Ye know we won' make it today," I muttered. "Still too far from th' city."

"I know," she replied. "Just keep reusing those arrows if you can and we'll be in good shape. You run out, we're dead." I nodded. She was smarter than I thought, and so was the horse.

But I couldn't stop thinking about the night before.

I just met her. So why was I already comfortable enough to cry like a little bitch around her? I was never this comfortable around my own brother. But there was something about her that just put me at ease, made me feel like I could trust her with anything. She almost felt like the little sister I never had.

Or was I simply trying to replace Beth?

I knew better than to even hope that she was alive. She was dead; there was no arguing that. She was too weak, and had been sheltered basically all her life. She wouldn't stand a chance.

But Annie was here and alive. I had to focus on her and keep her alive as long as possible. I would not fail her like I did Beth.

"You're thinking too hard, Daryl," she stated softly. I blinked, wondering how long I've been thinking.

"Sorry," I mumbled. "Tend ta do that ev'ry so of'en."

Been doing it too often for my taste.

"Look, about the other night," she started, and I let out a hard breath. Dammit. She ain't gonna let it go. "I know rednecks. Most of my friends and family were rednecks. Crying isn't something they do. I'm sorry if what I said struck a nerve. I keep forgetting that we don't really have much of an opportunity to do anymore. Hell, we don't even have time to properly grieve or process anything. It does kind of make me feel a bit better to know that you're already comfortable enough around me to do that."

Now how the fuck am I supposed to respond to that?

"Guess I couldn' stop m'self," I muttered. She smiled, and my heart started fluttering.

When the fuck did it ever do that?

She was pretty, I'll admit that. But she ain't Carol. Carol was tough. Had to be, seeing as though her worthless ass husband would beat her and poor Sophia everyday. And she became tougher after loosing her family.

But Carol was still small.

I took a deep breath to stop the tears from even trying. She was dead too. Everyone I've ever known is fucking dead.

_Focus on Annie. Keep her and the horse alive._

"Les go 'head an' fin' a place for camp," I suggested. "B'fore we cum 'cross a herd o' them fuckers."

"Sounds good," Annie responded, turning the beast towards the woods.

I can only hope she don't die on me as well.

* * *

We cooked some more of that deer and found a barn slam full of hay for Apollo. I kept watch as she put him in a stall so he could sleep easy. I hadn't noticed how exhausted I was. When was the last time I slept?

Before Beth disappeared?

Before the safe haven Rick had built was brought down?

It had been so fucking long I couldn't remember. That or I was too tired to think straight.

"Sleep," her voice commanded from behind me. "I'll keep watch tonight. You look beat."

"Feel it, too," I breathed. "Ya got good aim, Annie gal?" She smiled, but I could see I had struck a nerve.

"Yeah, I do," she answered. "My dad used to call me Annie girl." I blinked.

Way to fucking go, Dixon.

"Sorry," I apologized.

"No, it's okay," she laughed. "It feels good to hear a familiar nick name." I chuckled, and before I knew it, we were laughing like the apocalypse hadn't been upon us.

Maybe I didn't fuck up too bad.


	4. Loosing Hope

_Disclaimer: I own nothing. Not even Daryl._

* * *

_Yes, Daryl is being a total pussy. He's opened up to a girl he just met. But keep in mind everything he's been through since we first see him._

_So, now that Daryl is showing his softer side, who's ready to see what happens next?_

_Sit back and enjoy!_

_Love always,_

_Avoline_

* * *

I woke up to see she was still keeping guard. She wasn't missing any arrows, thankfully.

"Had a few walk by," she began as I started breakfast. "They didn't hear anything, so I just let them walk." I managed a smiled. Her redneck side is smart for a girl.

"Conserve ammo," I muttered as she sat next to me. "Apollo seemed t' enjoy bein' able t' relax." She giggled as the horse finally stood and showed himself.

"Yeah, he did," she laughed. "He actually snored a few times." I laughed at that one.

"T' bad ya couldn' git a picture," I chuckled.

"That is one of the many things I miss," she replied. "Electricity and a hot shower."

"And fresh, cold beer," I added. She smiled at me.

"If the world ever goes back to normal, we should take on one of those legal moonshine distilleries in Gatlinburg," she chirped out cheerfully. I raised an eyebrow at her.

"Where da fuck is Gatlinburg," I asked her. Her jaw dropped.

"Oh, my God," she exclaimed. "You've never been to Gatlinburg, Tennessee?" I shook my head.

"Ain't n'ver been outside o' Georgia," I answered. She laughed and took a bite of the last of the deer.

"It's a fun little resort town that is always hopping," she began. "They've got numerous Ripley's attractions, at least five legal moonshine distilleries just sitting in the open, and everything except the one star ski resort is within walking distance. Just up the road is Pigeon Forge, which is almost totally owned by Dolly Parton herself. Best time to go is winter time, when the lights are up and the rates are low. Daddy always rented a cabin for us instead of us sleeping in some ratty hotel." I nodded, imagining it as she said.

"Sounds fun," I responded. "Wish I had had th' chance t' go." She patted my hand.

"I'm sure it's more fun now that it's basically empty," she smiled. "No having to pay for any of the attractions, although all the fish in the aquarium are probably dead."

"And rottin'," I grumbled. "Coulda survived fer a week on dat." She nodded.

"Almost everything you can get from nature as far as meat is tainted," she murmured. "Only thing that isn't is people." I shook my head.

"We're all infected," I told her. "Found out last time I was in Atlanta. Ev'ry damn body's infected. We all turn." Her shoulders sagged.

"So it doesn't matter," she whispered. "We all turn into those things."

Damn me and my big fat, goddamn mouth.

* * *

We were riding along when I saw it in the distance. We some how managed to make it this way without putting down a single walker. And without nearly getting killed. I must being doing good. Still got Annie, still got the horse, and I'm unharmed.

But the walker's ain't our biggest threat. It's the people that are still alive. Cause they're smart enough to set up traps.

"Let's scope it out first," I said, my voice not even hinting to my backwoods raising. "Might be a trap. The livin' are the biggest threat." I felt her tense in front of me.

"Really," she breathed.

Fear. She's afraid now. She thought the living would band together and finally unite without a problem. She's so optimistic and till somewhat innocent. How, I don't know. Cause most everyone else has lost all trace of innocence.

"Yeah," I answered. "Learnt that the hard way. Can't trust t'many people. As far as m'self, Ah'm me regardless. The me you've seen tha past few days is the me Ah'll always be." She relaxed as she steered towards an old dumping ground.

"Good," she commented. "Daddy always said when all else fails, rednecks will always be themselves no matter what. You don't seem that bad, Daryl." I snorted out of habit.

"Ah try not ta be," I muttered. "Ah try ta be th' best Ah can be." She nodded.

"Good to know," she piped up. "If everyone in the world was like you, it wouldn't be near as scary." I bit back a laugh. If everyone in the world was like me, they'd all be alive.

Even Beth.

"You're thinking too hard again," she stated loudly.

"Tend ta do that 'lot lately," I repeated. "Gettin' ta be a habit."

"I can't say I blame you," she answered. "I do it a lot too."

"Really," I chuckled. "Whatdaya think about?"

"Home," she began. "What's left of it. What it used to be. All the memories made there. And how it's gone now." All I could do was hug her as Apollo kept walking. "I miss it, Daryl. I miss it so badly. But I had to burn the house and the barns because of all the walkers. They ate all but Apollo, and I keep saying one day, when things go back to normal, I'll go home."

"Things ain't evah gone be normal 'gain," I replied simply. "Ev'rythang's so fucked up that there ain't no goin' back."

"Isn't that the truth," she agreed.

I tried to ignore the flutter in my chest.


	5. Loosing Walls

_Disclaimer: I own nothing. Not even Daryl._

* * *

_So, Daryl and Annie are getting closer little by little. How much will he open up to her?  
_

_Sit back and find out!_

_Love always,_

_Avoline_

* * *

We finally made it to the store, only to find that it was actually void of walkers. We still secured a good hiding spot for Apollo a good distance away, just in case. I kept an eye on our surroundings while she picked a path through the trees around the area. Something about having her around made me more protective of her. She was the irritating little sister I didn't fucking ask for.

But damn, was she pretty.

I mentally kicked my own ass. She was at least half my age, and clearly came from better stock than me. Why the fuck would she even be interested in a mean son of a bitch like me? Hell, we were in a live or die situation all the damn time. Romance wasn't something we could afford as survivors. We had to keep surviving, and that meant keeping emotions in check. No letting shit like sex and feelings happen, no matter how safe you thought you were.

"The glass doors are kicked in," she noted. "We can look, but it's probably already been looted." I snorted and followed her through the glass.

"Most people go fer bullets and guns," I answered.

"But not arrows. There should be a ton of them in there. More than enough to hold you for months. Or for forever if you keep yanking them back out." I chuckled at her as we made our way to the back of the store.

"Well, dayum, you were right," I muttered. "Shit ton o' arrows." We started grabbing as many as possible, and I grabbed a few quivers to hold them all. "Should b'able ta kill a bunch o' them with these."

"Look at all the .22 ammo left behind," she exclaimed. "Shit's worth the price of gold!" She started grabbing boxes of ammo, stuffing them into a hiking pack she had grabbed on the way through the store. I paused, watching her with... Affection? Nah, couldn't be. But what was it? Intrigue? Probably. How many girls that young know how to survive like this? She rounded the counter and grabbed a Beretta that had been left behind, as well as a few mags for it.

Damn, she was everything I wanted and then some.

I shoved the thoughts away. Everyone I let close died. If I kept my distance, she might survive. If I kept everything friendly, she wouldn't die. If I had kept Beth at a safe distance, she'd still be here. Same with Carol, and the rest of them. Fairly sure they're all dead. Even little Judith.

Tears burned at my eyes again, and I mentally kicked myself. I had to quit being such a damn pussy. She would wind up laughing at me at some point if I didn't. I wasn't sure why I cared so much what she thought of me, but I couldn't stop if I tried. She had wormed her way in without even meaning to. I didn't even know when or how, but I'm sure it was quick. And I know it's gonna hurt like hell when something happens to her.

"Daryl," she whispered, and I turned to see her standing right beside me. "What's going on inside that head of yours?" I shook my head. "Daryl, don't. As far as I can tell, it's only me and you for a good long while. Don't shut me out." I stared at it her for a minute, battling between spilling my guts again or not.

Ah, fuck, why not?

"Th' group I was with had a few kids in th' mix," I began. "One teenager, a few tweens and younger, and a baby." She reached for my hand, and damn, it felt good. "I let m'self get to close t' all o' em, an' I let em get too close t' me. I keep thinkin', jus' keep ya at a distance, and when dem walkers git ya, it won' hurt as bad." I snorted and looked away. "Failin' miserably at that." Her tiny little arms wrapped around me, and I couldn't help but do the same to her.

"Hey, it's going to be okay," she soothed. "The walkers won't get me. Know why?" I shook my head. "Cause I met you. You're nicer than you let on. You won't let them hurt me. I know you won't, Daryl. You have a kind heart under that tough exterior. I know it seems safer to keep everyone at a distance, but it leaves you with no one to lean on when you need them." I tried to pull back, but her arms stayed tight. "Don't shut me out. We all need someone, and you can't say you aren't curious to see where this goes with us." I sighed and avoided looking in her eyes.

"Can't say I ain't," I admitted. "But ye shoul' know, bein' wit me ain't easy. Ah'm hard on th' heart, and Ah ain't easy on th' eyes." She smiled at me.

"Considering the lack of clean, running water, you look just fine to me," she argued softly. "I'm not easy to be with either. I've been cheated and lied to, and it's left cracks. I might become suspicious of you or I might get jealous if another girl gets too close. That's just who I've become." I couldn't help but smile at her.

"Then we ain't all dat diff'rent," I chuckled. "Ah'm 'bout as territorial as a wolf. Ah won't have some punk tryin' ta flirt wit ya." She smiled at me.

"Same here," she echoed. "I don't like to share. Never have, never will."

Damn, where's she been all my life?


End file.
